Three Thoughts That Lead You Away From Your Values

Heading into the second day of the largest CrossFit competition in the Midwest, my teammate Mike and I were in 2nd place, only 12 points out of first. Each placing earned 6 points, so we had to beat the team in 1st and have someone finish between us.

Thankfully, they were lined up directly beside us going into the first event of the day.

The judge reviews the standards and reminds us our handstand walks must be in at least 10 foot unbroken segments. If we fall, we have to start that segment over.

“Athletes, standby. 10 seconds.”

The workout starts, and Mike and I fly through the 40 cal row and dumbbell squats, eager to get to our 15, 20-foot handstand walk segments. We are ahead of the team in first, but not by much.

While Mike is walking, I glance left and right, trying to see where we stand. Every team we can sneak between us and first increases our lead.

In the middle of that, I notice one of the guys on the team in first come down during his handstand walk. I think back to the standard, unbroken segments, and hear a voice in my head, “They can’t do that. You need to say something. This will help you win.”

Without thinking, I yell to their judge, “Hey, that’s a no rep. They have to go back.”

She looks at me confused, then keeps counting. Mike grabs my shoulder, “Jason, it’s your turn.”

After the workout, Mike says, “What were you doing, man? That was not cool. We don’t talk to judges like that.” Turns out, they were breaking their walk into 10 foot segments, which was completely legal.

Not only did I make a fool of myself yelling at a volunteer judge, I was also wrong.

With the pressure to win being the only thing on my mind, I acted completely out of character. In an amateur competition with a couple hundred bucks on the line, I let pressure make a decision for me instead of my values.

Every time I think about that moment, even now, I get embarrassed. It makes me ask, how does this happen?

The reality is, we rarely choose to go against our values. We talk ourselves into it. We tell ourselves things that sound reasonable, but are deceptive at best and embarrassing at worst.

Here are three of the most common:

“I don’t have time to do it the right way.”

This shows up when pressure is high and the clock is ticking.

It sounds efficient, but usually means:

• cutting corners

• lowering standards

• choosing speed over integrity

Doing it the wrong way often costs more time later, fixing mistakes, rebuilding trust, or starting over.

Pressure should not remove our values, it should reveal them.

“Everyone else does it.”

If it is common, it must be fine, right?

This is how we hand off responsibility. Our values were never meant to be crowdsourced.

When you justify your actions based on others, you stop leading and start following the lowest common denominator.

Standards do not mean much if they disappear in a crowd.

“Just once can’t hurt.”

Consistency ends where compromise begins.

These decisions feel harmless in the moment, but they create patterns over time.

“Just once”:

• makes the next time easier

• weakens your internal line

• shifts what feels acceptable

"Every action is a vote for the person you are becoming." - James Clear

Looking back, even though we won the workout, it still feels like a loss. It had nothing to do with the result, and everything to do with who I chose to be under pressure. That is the real test, and it shows up more often than we think.

Fact

Research from Albert Bandura shows people justify small unethical actions first, making larger ones easier later.

Action

Create a personal standard ahead of time. Decide what you will do before pressure hits, so you are not negotiating in the moment.

Question

When was the last time I said, “just this once,” and what followed?

Quote

“If it is not right, do not do it; if it is not true, do not say it.” - Marcus Aurelius